SINGLE and SATISFIED

What's wrong with being single? Little is spoken about being single, except as a condition to avoid like the plague. In the dawn of a new millennium, it's time to say what being single is really all about. Society expects every man and woman to wed, preferably before the age of 30, and to have at least one child (two is perfect). Even though the term "old maid" is no longer politically correct, many still respond with surprise if an older woman remains unhitched. The message couldn't be clearer. It's not okay to be alone. Sometimes, singles are excluded from "couples" nights or activities or they're advised to "bring a friend."

Being in a loving relationship has its benefits, no doubt about it. Someone to talk to at any given moment, someone to rub your sore shoulders after a hard day's work, someone to do things with, someone to keep you warm at night, someone to buy you gifts at Christmas time and Valentine's Day, someone to make you feel special, and someone to whisper "sweet nothings" in your ear. Financially, couples are better off than individuals, and child-rearing is a lot easier with two parents. Also, being in a relationship helps us feel "normal." You don't have to worry about playing the dating game or trying to figure yourself out (maybe); you're okay because someone else says you are.

However, being single can be a rejuvenating experience. In fact, one can't truly be successful in a relationship without being single for a time. Being single allows us to do what we want, when we want, and with whom we want without having to answer to anyone. This is because we have more time on our hands and are not avoiding looking at ourselves by focusing our energies on someone else. Basically, being single affords each of us the opportunity to discover who we are, what we do and don't like, how we deal with things, what we want out of life, what our expectations are, what our potentials and limitations are, what energizes and empowers us, and what discourages and disappoints us. The goal of being single should be to learn to fulfill ourselves, to meet our needs, and to develop as a human being regardless of whether or not we choose to enter into a relationship.

Key Vocabulary:

rejuvenating
to make young or youthful again, to restore to an original or new state
figure
to discover, to determine
child-rearing
raising a child
better off
being in comfortable economic circumstances, being in a more advantageous position, luckier
excluded
prevented from or restricted the entrance of, being removed from
unhitched
still single, not taken yet
politically correct
conforming to a belief that language and practices which could offend political sensibilities (as in matters of sex or race) should be eliminated
old maid
old lady
plague
a clear area in a bacterial culture produced by viral destruction of cells, contagious diseases

Discussion Questions:

Why do you think some people remain single?
Would you like to be single all your life?
Is it better to be single or married? Why?
What are the advantages of being single?
Do you think that single people are happier?
Do you think it is easier for man or woman to be single?
Why did you think some people prefer to be single?
Do you think that there is a soulmate somewhere for everyone?
Do you think that single people like being single?
In your country, what do people think about a woman in her 30s who is unmarried?
In your country, what do people think about a man in his 30s who is unmarried?

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